


not a notebook of lyrics, but a notebook of rejection

by HardenedClay



Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Attempt at Humor, Bullying, Cute, Eventual Happy Ending, Fights, Fist Fights, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Foiled Confessions, Kinda portrayed like a k-drama cause yeah, Light Angst, M/M, Other, Slight fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:34:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24252145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HardenedClay/pseuds/HardenedClay
Summary: in the midst of a series of events, baekhyun is definitely sure that he was rejected for the 7th time.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun & Park Chanyeol, Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol





	1. the usual morning

**Author's Note:**

> i usually mostly write angst so i find it hard to be writing a fic like this  
> but i wanna experiment n such so i hope i do a good job on this story !
> 
> hope yall enjoy

For a split second, my consciousness conveys to my body that I'm finally awake. My eyes struggle to open themselves, in-fact, I'm not a morning person. I whimper, squirming all over my messed, yet at the same time, comfortable bed. I find it incredibly hard to wake, and it was most likely because of my extreme fatigue that I experience every morning. My mind tells me to stay on bed and try to sleep more because I deserve more rest than work, but something about that didn't feel right. _Why do I feel like I'm forgetting something? I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to do something extremely important today,_ I thought. That thought now knocks around my head, making me feel restless and awful in bed. Because of that, my lids instantly flick open and the first thing I see is my brother, Baekbeom, standing by the side. "Ya, Byun Baekhyun. You're gonna be late for your classes." His smiley smug expression and the coffee he's holding in-front of me makes me slightly nervous. "Why do I feel like you're gonna splash coffee on my face if I don't get up." I mutter, not caring if my volume was loud enough for him to hear. "Yeah, maybe that's what I'm planning actually." Baekbeom joked, chuckling whilst this confirmed that he did hear it.

Though his words instantly had me sitting up and standing up shortly after. "Fine," I croaked, scratching my neck and heading to the bathroom. "Don't forget to brush your teeth! You've got 45 minutes to ready up or I'll leave without you." He shouted with glee. The response I could muster up was a loud scoff and my pathetic door slam.   
A couple of minutes passed by and I was scrambling to get into my uniform. My older brother watched in pity as he helped me pack up my pencils and pens into my backpack. "Oh yeah. I just remembered," My eyes darted back to my brother, "Hm?" I hummed whilst fixing up my tie. "I might come home late tonight, I have some big exams going on next week." Baekbeom smiled softly at me, reassuring that I was fine by his decision. "That's okay. I can handle myself." I smiled back, reaching out to pat his chest. "I'll just text you if I need any help." 

"Alright. Oh, and good luck with your so-called confession."  
I froze in my tracks, and looked at him, wide-eyed. "Confession?" I raised an eyebrow, mildly confused. "You don't remember? You were babbling about how you swore to your life that you'd say you love this guy at your school because he's been bothering you so much. Park Cha Yul, was it?" His statement, not only made me want to hit him for mispronouncing my friend's name, but made me recollect the things I ranted about yesterday night. I groaned loudly, kneeling down and covering my face.   
"Oh. . . I guess you forgot." "And it's Park Chanyeol, you moron." I mumbled through my palms. "Eheh, you were basically mumble-shouting, so." I facepalmed, standing back up and finishing up the rest of my things. "Come on, get your bag and hop on in the car." Baekbeom chirped, heading out my bedroom. I hummed in response, grabbing my backpack and following after him.

* * *

I let out a heavy sigh, stepping out of the seat. "Good luck with the studying, hyeongnim." I waved, "You too, and eat the lunch I packed you, alright? Don't focus on your love life too much, alright?" My brother nagged, and I could only roll my eyes jokingly. "Okay, okay. Bye!" I say as I close the door. My eyes watch as the car drives off until I couldn't see it in my field of vision anymore. I squint my eyes, suddenly feeling stressed. I quietly whine, turning around, only to scream at my friend who turned out to be facing me. Other students stare at me with weird expressions, and some others snicker or chuckle at my action. I can feel myself burning up a little. "Ya, Oh Sehun!" I exclaim, hitting him. He's flinching, trying to cover himself. "Sorry, sorry, didn't mean to scare you hyeong!" He laughs at my misery, and I purse my lips as I stop hitting him. "Come on, let's get to our lockers." Sehun grins cheekily and wraps his arm around my shoulder. "Aishi, fine. Let's go!" I look at him as I pat his back, letting our feet drag us both together inside of our campus building.

"So, how are you gonna confess to Chan?" Sehun quietly asked, looking quite concerned for me. "I guess I'll sneak a letter in his desk drawer before lunch." I responded, approaching my locker and opening it. My chest sinks the moment I look in it. My books had been thrashed, and my lyric notebook was missing. "Baekhyunie? Did something happen-" His voice trails off and I notice in the corner of my eye that he's also seen what's happened inside of my locker. I instinctively look down, feeling the tears build up. "Hey now, don't feel bad." He pats my head, helping me by taking out the books I need for my scheduled classes. I wipe my tears before they roll down my cheeks, the younger kids would laugh at me if they saw me crying in the hallway. "Thanks, Sehun-a." I mumbled, taking my slightly ragged books. They weren't in perfect condition, but at least I could still use them. 

I sigh heavily, eyes unsteady. I felt uncomfortable and uneasy now, why was today so nerving? "Ya, don't worry about it. You should go and buy a lock when you get home though. Some guys in my grade can be really childish sometimes, you know?" Sehun patted my chest, smiling. I eased up a little and smiled back. "Thanks man." "No problem."  
"Anyways, go to your classroom. Let's talk again in recess." I nodded, waving goodbye as we both parted ways. As I head for my classroom, I couldn't shake the feeling off. My lyric notebook was missing, and I'm truly scared for life. I often wrote my own lyrics in there and tried to play them with my piano at home or in our music room. What if they invaded that then kept it? I hope to God I find it somewhere lying around the building later-on. This has been happening for a while, I bother someone a little, someone trashes everything I have a lot. 

I arrive in my classroom, and I immediately see Jongdae and Chanyeol standing by my desk. My heart skips a beat seeing Chanyeol's face, I better act naturally. Everyone else in the classroom were busy talking to each other, and the homeroom teacher hadn't arrived yet, so I guess I have time to be able to talk to them.  
I approach the two, "What's going on?" I peek at them, and they both look at me. "Ah, Baekhyun. Some scumbag drew and doodled on your desk." Jongdae simply said, and I finally noticed they were both scrubbing my desk to hell. "Sorry Baekhyun-a. . We tried to scrub it clean but it was done by a permanent marker." Chanyeol lifted his hands off, scratching the back of his neck. My eyes darts on the writing, and started feeling insecure. Some words were blurred but the writing said something about how I'm not good enough. I sighed, "It's okay." I then put my backpack next to me, sitting down on my chair. "You shouldn't stay insecure, Baek. It doesn't define you." I looked up at Chanyeol, gulping. "Besides, you like singing anyways, right? Becoming a singer doesn't have any height requirements." Jongdae grinned, and I could only chuckle whilst I stuffed my books into my drawer. "Yeah. That's true." I felt a little better, thanks to Jongdae and, mostly to Chanyeol. 

"You're good enough for me anyway." Chanyeol smiled. I pursed my lips, feeling my ears heat up. While I prance about, Chanyeol leaves to sit on his desk, which was located in the row ahead of my seat. I cup my face in embarrassment, looking back up at Jongdae. "You're lucky to have such a man like Yeol." He joked, flicking my forehead. I squeak, clutching my forehead in pain. "Ow, ow. What was that for-" I complain, and I hear Jongdae walk back to his seat. My eyes dart towards the front of the room and I realize that our homeroom teacher finally arrived, and was about to set in for the morning.

I sighed, placing my head on my hand. I found myself looking at the windows, wondering again where my lyric notebook would be. "I'll get some help from Sehun." I mumbled, squinting my eyes as the sun started to move and seep into the classroom. I faced away from the windows, and my next target was Chanyeol's back. I smiled a little, letting myself melt a bit. I had no idea whatsoever on as to why I found this man's back so nice to look at, but I did. 

"Byun Baekhyun, prevent yourself daydreaming. We have a schedule to delay one of your classes later, I appreciate it if you don't get left out in the classroom later like a lost dog." I immediately snapped back to reality, and I stared wide-eyed at my homeroom teacher. Did she just compare me to a dog? Seriously? Either-way, that was extremely embarrassing just now. I felt myself shrink a little and lose a few years of my life hearing that, and especially when my other classmates started snickering. "Why did she have to mention a lost dog." I muttered under my breath, and no longer after a few seconds I couldn't help but mutter ' _kae mworago_ ' because I was still stunned from her comment.

* * *

Finally recess had begun. I could finally go and search for my lyric notebook, and start drafting my supposed letter of invitation. I groaned, stretching in my seat. In the corner of my eye, I notice Jongdae approaching me. "Can I come with you today." It was a rhetorical question that came out of his mouth. "Well, as long as you help me find my missing lyric notes, you can come with me." I grinned at him, "Oh, sure. Why's it missing?" I hummed whilst I put my notebooks and books back inside of my desk-drawer. "Remember how I reported a bunch of kids who I caught smoking in the back of the school? They probably messed my locker today, and luckily enough my lyric notebook was missing." I felt a little angry now instead of sad. I was a senior to them, and those kids would be disrespecting me. How come children are so wild these days.

"Yikes. Sounds awful." Jongdae patted my back, and I stood up. "Anyways, Sehun's gonna join, right? He's been waiting by the doorway."   
"Oh, really?" I raised both my eyebrows, and went outside of the room to see just exactly him, standing against the wall. "Ya, Oh Sehun!" I exclaimed, and he smirked, pulling out my dirty lyric notebook. "Huh! Where did you find that?" I took it from his hand, dusting the dirt off of it the best I could. "I saw one of my classmates sneak it inside his drawer. I confronted him and he was gonna hit me but then I stood up." He grinned, and Jongdae could only chuckle. "Atta boy." Jongdae high-fived Sehun. I raised an eyebrow, while I flipped through the pages. Nothing changed, except for the latest page. Someone had clearly written, ' _Byeontae Baekhyun_ '. I could feel myself swearing at a piece of paper.

"Whoever wrote that is correct, you're always catching glances at Chan whenever he's doing P.E." Sehun joked. I stared at him, then kicked his shin. He bit his lip, grabbed his leg, and had his mouth open agape from the pain. "Karma hits like a brick, doesn't it? Huh?" I nagged, ripping the page out and crumpled it. Jongdae was just laughing his ass of at this point. I scoffed, shoving the crumpled piece of paper in my pocket. "Anyhow. . . let's get some _tteokbokki_ , I heard they're adding melted cheese on it today." Jongdae said, wiping a tear. "Melted cheese? Jesus," Sehun commented, "Let's go then!" He added. Sehun, being the tallest, dragged both Jongdae and I to the cafeteria.  
  


**-tbc-**


	2. quick to conclusions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> almost dumped on by milk by a bunch of bullies, chanyeol comes to save the day. but something else quickly overshadows the fluttering of baekhyun's heart.

At this very moment, we were in the middle of PE class. This was our class before lunch break occurred. I was anxious, and extremely sensitive. I hadn't started on the letter yet, and our coach always gives a few amount of time for rest and separate time to shower, so that wasn't a fun thought that stuck on my mind. Despite that, I still have to focus on our coach's instructions or I would have to run then squat for the rest of the class. I stretched my arms, twisted and cracked a few parts here and there. I notice Jongdae approaching me, ", started on the letter?" He questioned, putting a towel around his neck. "No, not yet. I'm really worried about that, I'm not confident enough to go and ask him myself. Don't you think it's a bit awkward to do that?" I rambled, halted my stretching mid-way into the sentence. "Well, probably showering fast will be a good idea." He reached out to pat my shoulder, and looked me in the eye. I stared back at him, "You can do this man. I'm confident that you won't get rejected this time." Jongdae held up a thumbs up whilst grinning sheepishly. 

I sighed heavily, "Hopefully. . ." The word trailed off my tongue. Jongdae reassured me and we proceeded to PE class activities. Luckily enough for me, I was too drowned in my thoughts and ended up getting the run-and-squat penalty. I mentally cursed myself, I told myself just a couple minutes ago that I would focus so I don't slow down my process today. Maybe I do have to ask Chanyeol myself after all, and that was the worst part. It just seems so strange to invite someone, by confronting them yourself, somewhere private to confess, you know? This isn't how it usually works in High-school. I was brought back to reality when my coach hit my back, and yelled, "Get to running!"  
I let out a yelp and started automatically running on the track. Damnit, that smack really hurt to the bone, quite literally. My spine feels like it rattled for a millisecond. I groaned and whined, but didn't complain any further, since I figured I would most likely receive another punishment out of PE. Anyways, I ran. This was my fourth time doing this penalty in the span of a school-year, and each time I do it, time starts to feel like an eternity. 

Probably because all I did was run in the same pattern, which made it that I've done the same thing over and over and will continue to do so for the next twenty minutes. At some point, I found myself sitting down beside the track, on the grass. Thankfully, the coach wasn't that cruel and would give me time to rest as-well. I sweated buckets, and the scorching heat of the sun making contact with my skin didn't help either. I looked over to my classmates, examining them one by one. "If I didn't mess myself up, I wouldn't look like a lone fool right now," I talked to myself. I hummed, and after looking at each of every one of them, I realized, Chanyeol wasn't anywhere to be found?  
Wow, the least I could do for myself was have a view of my crush, and yet he wasn't in my field of vision. I'm stupid to pick such a bad spot, I lightly hit myself on the head.

I went and scooted myself near the metal fence that separated our PE field and our school front-campus. It had been probably a minute now, and 3 minutes in and I'll be up and running again. I wiped my sweat, prepping myself. A voice then erupted, "Baekhyun, watch out!" I instantly turned my head, wherever I heard it from. It was Chanyeol's, and I saw him running closer to me. I raised an eyebrow, watch out? Before I knew it, milk splashed on-top of my head, dripping down my face down to my arms and chest. I heard a bunch of guys laugh before sprinting away. I found myself frozen in place, not daring to move a single inch. I felt scrummy, and sticky. The sweat, the heat, then mixed with the milk, it didn't go too well together. I had stood up, and a few seconds later my classmates are scattered on the field and Chanyeol and Jongdae are by my side, the coach is somewhere off talking to the guidance counselor.

I kept my gaze down at the ground. I felt disgusting currently, and I had no idea what to do. I was getting bullied, right? This is what it was. The raiding of my locker, the vandalizing and stealing of my belongings and desk, and this. I wasn't going to deny that I wanted to cry, this had never happened in my entire life. Last week, everything was completely fine. Maybe reporting the students were a bad idea? Should I tell about this to Baekbeom hyeong? "Baekhyunie, you might want to go get a shower real quick. I think coach Lee is ending class early to sort this out." Jongdae kneeled down to look at my face, and he wiped the tears in my eyes. I stayed silent, in disbelief. I could only sigh heavily, "Yeah, sure." I mumbled. I felt a grip on my arm, and suddenly I was being dragged. I looked up and saw that it was Chanyeol doing this. I was confused, and shortly after heard Jongdae shouting _Meet me again at the classroom later!_

"Yeol?" I uttered out in confusion, and our feet lead us to the gym men's showers. "Which one is your locker?" He turned his head back at me, and I could feel a slight blush creeping up my cheeks. Was this actually happening right now? Wow. If the confession goes well, maybe I can do story time with my brother later. Wait, nevermind, back to the situation. I blink, pause for a second, trying to process and point to wherever mine was. "Go and take a shower, I'll take your uniform out." Chanyeol patted my head, and I inhaled and exhaled **hard**. I went and showered as he said, and gave me my uniform in the cubicle I was in. Shortly after, I walked out of the cubicle and sat down on the benches. He had sat down along beside me. Socks in hand, and school shoes settled next to my bare feet. "I can't believe the 9th graders are so immature nowadays, huh?" I heard Chanyeol blurt out, and I could see him crossing his arms as I fit a foot into a sock.

"I. . I guess." I responded, taking time to putting both socks on to have a small conversation with him. My school year is reaching its end, months totalling in five months left and our next path to life would be university. Throughout this whole year and the previous year, I had developed a big crush on this guy called Park Chanyeol. Despite him now being one of my friends, I was still somewhat awkward around him. Our chat right now is one of our first few genuine conversations we've had with each other, without me only listening to him talk with a bunch of other friends. "I also heard from Sehunie that they stole your lyric notebook, I felt a little sorry about that." I caught a glance at him, Chanyeol was scratching the back of his neck. "It's okay, Sehun got it back. My lyric notebook contains some personal things so I'm grateful for him." I cracked a smile, feeling nice that someone I liked was caring about me for once.

The air was a little awkward. Why was it this way? Usually, Chanyeol would be leading the conversation on, but right now was different. I heard him clear his throat, and at this point, I was just about to put my shoes on. "Anyways, are you alright? They've been disturbing you quite a lot today." He patted my back, leaning his head downwards to look at me. I chuckled, "I'm pretty good. Today hasn't been the best, but I hope the next few days aren't too bad,"   
It wasn't too bad as Chanyeol would always come to the rescue and make things better once again when things suddenly started rotting. "Don't worry, when things get 'too bad', Jongdae, Sehun, and I will be near you always." He grinned at me, and ironically I smiled back. Of course, who wouldn't want to smile back at a happy virus like him? It's hard to resist it. 

Footsteps rang into the room. I then saw my male classmates coming into the showers, and then my coach at the end of the crowd. "Hey Baekhyunssi, I'm really sorry about the ruckus earlier. Are you alright?" I nodded at his question. I stood up, "Anyways, I'm giving you guys a ten minute earlier lunch, I have to go and sort out those troublemakers real quick. You can go now." The coach walked off, and I looked back at Chanyeol. "Should I wait for you?" I asked him, "No, I'm fine. Go to the classroom, Jongdae might come finding you later." 

"Well, okay. See you!"  
I waved to him and walked out.

* * *

I groaned, ruffling my hands through my hair. The letter I was writing wasn't going so well, every other draft I've thought of was either corny, awful, or straight-up creepy. I slumped myself on my desk, despite knowing it was just seven minutes left to go until the bell rung and lunch would begin. Jongdae sighed in disappointment, "How come you write lyrics like a composer but write letters like a poser?" He joked, and I hit him in the stomach. He slightly winces in pain, "Shut it or you're getting the pen next." I threatened him, and sighed heavily afterwards. "But what you said just now is true." I hear Jongdae laughing in pain in response to my statement.

If I don't get this done quickly, I'll have to ask Chanyeol in person! That would be extremely awkward. Maybe I should just say I'll thank him and treat him to food? . . . No, that would just be straight-up lying to his face. I'm here to confess my feelings, not thank him for something. . . "How about you just ask him to meet up later at the gate, _paboya_." Jongdae flicked my forehead, and I flinched, clutching my head. "Hey, what was that for?" " _Ya inma_ , Chanyeol is easy-going and social, he won't think simply meeting up with a friend will get him robbed off of his wallet or killed in an alleyway. . . Unless you're gonna do that if he rejects you?" I stare up at him with an unamused face. "No, I'm not a fucking maniac, Jongdae. I won't rob him or murder him if I get rejected." I firmly stated, and he smiled in an attempt to hold back laughter and to prevent another wave of pain to come.

I went back to slumping over on my desk, pen still in hand. I heard Jongdae sigh, then tap me. "Stand up, I'm dragging you to wherever Chanyeol is." I turned my head and looked up at him, "What?" I said, confused. He squinted his eyes at me, then forced me to stand up. "Wait- wait a second!" I whisper-yelled to avoid a scene in the classroom. My heart was racing, as I was now being dragged to god knows where the guy I like is. I checked my phone and saw that it was just 3 minutes left until lunch. We spent that much time already? Christ, maybe I do need to do this now. "Okay, you're probably right Jongdae." I stammered, and he just laughed. "Exactly, time-checks are pretty handful right?"  
I scoffed at him, rolling my eyes a little. But then Jongdae suddenly stopped in his tracks, and my feet were put to rest. "Hey, what's up. . .?" My eyes trailed from Jongdae, who was staring at a distance, to wherever his focus was. 

What I saw made me feel like my chest drop to the bottom of the earth.   
A junior's arm was around Chanyeol's arm, and they were walking down the stairs. They were laughing, but the school bell ringing had drowned out the sound. Not again, this was happening again. No, I thought Chanyeol was different. He never hung around girls, why now? This was stupid, I shouldn't be this distraught because this is just a high-school crush, is all. But yet again, I still felt somewhat _betrayed_ even if he did nothing. "Damnit, Jongdae." I tried to joke, "Let's go meet up with Sehun, huh? It's lunch. He's waiting for us." Jongdae looked back at me with a concerned face, but I smiled it off. "It's fine man. It's always been like this." I gulped down the urge to cry for the hundredth time today. "Baek, I-" "Today's just really unlucky for me." I patted his back, laughing. 

Again, again, again, and **_AGAIN_**. I write lyrics about the people I like, I describe their existence in flowers and vast seas, I sing and create tunes and melodies of these words I had written up for them, and in-return, that familiar rejection is handed to me. It's not their fault, they have different feelings, usually I'm not so affected but today had been remarkably awful. And this time, I didn't even confess. I just watched him walk down with another person and that was that. It was all clear. I'm now walking back, with Jongdae, and all I can think of is how stupid and dumb I feel at this very moment. For some reason, each time I like someone, I always think it's gonna be different. Despite that, it ends up being the same. "I'm sorry, but I can't accept your feelings." Are some very common pair of words that I hear in my lifetime. Did I destroy a country in my previous life that the heavens doesn't like the idea of me being in-love with someone? I always used to think of that, day and night when I was younger. I've come to accept the fact that I perhaps have, but this was just all too cruel.

But whatever. . .   
I'll just take time to get over him like always.

**-tbc-**


End file.
